I've had a few serious relationships in my time. I've heard more than a few stories about that girl he used to date. Without going into specifics, they cover several different areas.She was too much of a freak in bed.She used him for his money, getting him to finance everything, then dumped him.She was a psycho bitch. (This is pretty much the standard.)Before you men come forward and say this...I'm going to state that this blog can go for both sexes and be done with it. But today, we're going to pick a side and stick with it. Because that's how I roll.

Women, when you start a new relationship and he starts talking about his ex, LISTEN. I know it can get boring...I know you're wondering why doesn't he just get over it already. But, the truth is, there's valuable information in what he's telling you.The guy I dated with the sex-freak ex? A complete prude. Yes, such men exist. He had the sex drive of a fountain pen and over time, that just gets old. Later, looking back, I realized that so-called nymphomaniac was probably just a normal woman, trying to bring some spice into their lackluster sex life.

Of course, then you realize he'll be characterizing YOU as a sex-freak to the next seven women he dates. (Or a psycho, because that is, after all, the standard.)The guy with the money-grubbing ex? A complete and total pushover. I never got past date one with him because it was obvious on the date he had no spine whatsoever. He'd financed this girl completely for a year, only to find out she'd been cheating on him with a guy who wasn't such a pushover. Icky-poo. Grow a pair, dude.Now, about the fact that all their exes are psycho...Hon, trust me on this, you'll be psycho someday too. Because when he suddenly one day decides, after six months of dating and sleeping together, that he's just not going to ever call, speak to, or see you again, you just might do a little something to get his attention.

Like show up at his house unannounced during the big game on Sunday.Only, to the next girl, he'll describe you as, "The girl who just kept stalking me." He'll conveniently leave out the fact that you were stalking him because he declined to let you know it was over and just vanished. Because, we all know, when someone is telling the story of his past relationships, he conveniently omits all guilt on his part.See how it works?It helps if he's bitter about ALL his past relationships, because he'll talk about them exhaustively. And you can start to see a pattern emerge. Guaranteed, if you stay with him long enough, that pattern will start to become all too clear. You'll realize he's a dud in bed. Or that he's an insensitive jerk. You may not make the connection but if you really stop and think, you'll consider all of those other exes he's characterized as freakshows and realize maybe they weren't such freakshows after all. Over time, you even begin to feel a sort of camaraderie with those exes.

They've survived this. You wish you could start a club and commiserate over what a nutjob he is.Of course you don't. Because that would be wrong. At best, what you do is learn from each experience and become more easily able to spot those red flags from the beginning.So, for those of you still single, next time you meet someone you really like, listen when he talks about that ex. Note everything he says and try your best to see it from her perspective. Because if you don't, you'll find out exactly what she found out. And you'll be the psycho he's telling his next girlfriend about.