Have You ever Felt Like....
Have you ever felt like
You looked in the eyes of the one you might love, or the one whom you have fallen deeply in love with… and see something that no one else sees?
You see the beauty in them as they sleep? You see the beauty in their eyes as they speak, you watch the corners of their mouth curl as they smile at something you have said
And you realize that they are showing you something intimate? Something others don't see? And then, as this vision of them expands.. you see them for all the love they have in their heart. They way they might love their child. The way they looked at their mom or dad when they were but a little child themselves?
And you feel like no one else has loved them the way you do right now?
That you see them in a way no one else sees them. And for all their stubbornness or anger, you see the little child within, and you long to embrace them? You long to hold them forever? You are certain that no one else will ever love them as much as you, no one else will understand..
And the warm sensation of love washes over you, for they have become quite gorgeous, and your heart feels something that has no words.. though you wish so much you could say it
And you wish so much you could keep it
Like a little secret all to yourself
And you want to just lift them up to the stars, to see them fly to glory, and accomplish their every dream, and taste of every hope, and share of them, partake, that they would then look upon you as the key, they very soul that helped make them what they have now become, and gratitude pours from their eyes, as love flows and tells you that nothing else matters
Except that right now at this moment, you are here together
And have you ever had them call you stupid for it?
For this dream?
For seeing them as something amazing, angelic? All too eager to prove to you that it isn't true, that they reject this adorati
Instead of trying to live up to it, letting you love them as that glorious vision, as well as for where they are now, they discourage you, and crush that dream, that vision
By doing things that make it near impossible to love
And you hang on anyway, through their dastardly deeds, knowing that beauty is still there, the little kid that lies within, that innocence of the beautiful, powerful part of them… that seems to be harder and harder to see
Until we feel a fool for seeing it, for imagining it, because they have crushed it, even on purpose, or perhaps not, and then
You question yourself
Did you really see it? Was there really the beauty underneath, and you just couldn't tap into it, draw it out, because of their pain and fear?
Or that it was never there, and they have fooled you, like a wolf in sheep's clothing, flashing only moments of brilliance, enough to lure you into a trap, reaching for a sparkly thing that will only cut you if you try and touch
Or did you lie to yourself, knowing somehow they would cut you anyway, but hoping against hope that they were for real, trying desperately to fashion something real that was only a dream, that you clung to precariously, looking away from the obvious danger, from your own need to be loved, and your own need to believe
Knowing that the only other option
Was to acknowledge
That there was no point in hoping at all…